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Thread: Hard Age

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2009

    Hard Age

    What age did you have the hardest time with, with you kids? Not tantrums, hormones, and back talking, etc. I'm thinking along the lines of emotionally hard on you.

    My baby turned five today and it has been a hard week leading up to today. My baby is five. She is now old enough for kindergarten. She is old enough to go to school every day, for a longer period of time. She keeps promising me that she'll be as sweet as my little four year old. She is such a doll. One day I said to her, "I wish you could stay four forever!" She replied "That isn't Heavenly Father's Plan." True, true baby girl.

    I know that they all have to grow up, and I know harder times will come. This milestone has set me back emotionally. I love my girls and I am grateful for everyday. It is fun watching them learn and grow, but I didn't expect it to be this hard.

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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Kim, you'll make it. Trust me. :O) My first "hardest time" was when my youngest went to school. No one needed me 24/7 anymore. That was tough. The other hardest time . . . is a long way away for you.

    Look ahead. Like looking forward to a party or a trip. Find things to look forward to. You'll have many fun time with these girls and they've only just started. :O)

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Annapolis MD
    Late 20s? when they are adults and are sure they now know so much more than you do? Seriously, I found the days of diapers the hardest. If I never change another one again in my life, I'll be ok. I also recall that my mil said "it never gets better, it only gets different." I learned to take each stage in stride knowing I'd still be unprepared for what the next one would bring. Fortunately, my easiest child was my first born.

    oops missed that you wanted emotionally hard... That was when they went to college. I knew that was adulthood I'd not be a part of (nor was their father, who was becoming my xh) as they were distancing themselves for their own emotional well being. Ok now but it was hard then.
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Country Victoria, Australia
    If you ask my mum you never get past it, you'll worry about them until the day you die.

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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    South Carolina
    17 when they were struggling to be who they wanted to be, and 18 when they went in the Navy and left me... before that I enjoyed all of my time with them, and only had hard moments, mostly when my "no" wasn't what they wanted to hear. They are in their 30's now and I still only feel completely whole when I am around them-you would think I would get over that already!

    Imagine the possibilities...and Happy, Happy, Happy!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    A rural city in Victoria, Australia
    It looks like there's no reprieve for you! Aren't we a reassuring bunch?!
    Every age has its delights and torments. I found that ages 8 and 12 seemed to have the most difficulty emotionally for the girls. They are ages where friendship groups change and they had to redefine themselves. It was hard working through that with them. Each one is different, though, and presents different problems. From 14 to 18 my eldest started her slide into suffering from anxiety. At the same age my middle daughter thought she should be treated like an 18yo and pushed the boundaries. From 12 to 16 my youngest was bullied at school making her miserable. The worst for me was when my youngest left home. I felt so lost! Like Valerie, I just love it when we all get together. That is my only request on Mother's Day - that they all come home!
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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Reno, NV
    Seeing them change and grow is always bittersweet. Our job as parents is to foster these little beings into independent self-reliant adults. But in doing that, they need us less and less. The hardest day for me was taking our daughter to college. We were so thrilled for her to have the opportunity to go away to school. I made it through moving her into the dorm, meeting her roommate, etc. But I was a puddle of tears as we drove home that day. That was oneof the hardest days of my life.

  8. #8
    Kim, I'd like to give you a hug right now! As you can see from the comments, you are not alone in feeling the way you do. Like everyone is saying, each growing up milestone is difficult emotionally for a parent. My only advice is to keep busy and count your blessings over and over.

    Oh, and I find scrap therapy really helps me when I'm extra lonesome or sad.

    iMac computer/Adobe Creative Cloud: CS and Lightroom; SonyA57

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    New Zealand
    Every. Single. Day. They. Get. Older. Is. Hard. For. Me!!!! .
    Maybe it's having twins ... but the day they turned 5 and both left me to go to school was so hard. Next week they turn 10 and that also feels emotionally hard for me, but that could just be because they won't be here for their birthday!
    I'd personally love them to stay young and dependent forever, but in saying that I've loved every stage they've reached. They are becoming incredibly interesting characters now so I'm just trying to embrace every day and every change.
    I'll be an absolute cot case when they leave home!!

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  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Huntington, WV
    Kim, (((hugs))) from me too! Enjoy every moment now as they fly by so quickly. This is why I scrap, so I can still spend time with them.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Southern BC
    I think all the milestones are difficult! My most difficult time was when they went away to university - 2000 miles away. We teach them to be independent, confident and self-reliant and they truly are now. I have to say though I'd be a lot happier if they lived a bit closer! However, they are happy and that's what matters! As Merrilee said, counting your blessings and staying busy is a necessity!



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